Fear the Lord, not the Future

Last night I awoke at 1:30 and was filled with dark condemnation and anxiety. As I lay in bed, a litany of worries engulfed me, and my exhausted mind poured over imagined dire possibilities as well as all my pitiful shortcomings. There is something about the late nighttime hours that seems to give birth to every frightful worry and care, and we feel oppressed and lonely and utterly inadequate.

I finally got up at 3 a.m. and went and poured out my heart to the Lord. I read in those quiet moments, "Ps.147:11 "The Lord delights in those who fear Him, who put their hope in His unfailing love." And Ps.145:19 "He fulfills the desires of those who fear Him; He hears their cry and saves them." What a reminder it was to me this morning that we are to fear God, not circumstances or possible senarios or failures. He is our Hope when life seems hopeless. He is our Way when we have no idea where to go. He is our wisdom in the midst of confusion. He is our abundant Life when we are empty and exhausted. He is our Victory when we are facing defeat. He is our Song when are joyless. He is our Light when we walk in utter darkness. He is our Peace when we are anxious. He is our Grace when we are completely unworthy.

And He is the source of every good thing in our lives. As I poured out my heart to Him, I started thanking Him for every blessing I could think of--and as the list grew longer, my anxiety grew weaker and weaker. Ps.136 commands us over and over: "Give thanks to the Lord for He is good; His steadfast love endures forever." Sometimes we cannot figure out what on earth He is doing. Sometimes His plans seem mystifyingly and dramatically different from our hopes and dreams. As Beth Moore wrote: "God's ways will always be higher than ours, but we don't have to understand Him to settle the matter in our hearts that we can trust Him." Amen! It really is true that you cannot be filled with gratitude and worry at the same time! We daily, hourly, have to choose to focus on Him--the awesome unchangeable One-- on His greatness, on His blessings or focus on our ever changing circumstances. I choose Him! And for all the tomorrows, when faced with the choice once more, I pray for His grace and mercy to choose Him again and again and again all the way to glory!

In the words of one of Peter Marshall's prayers:

Thou knowest, Father, the things of which we are afraid--the terror by night, the arrow by day that takes us unawares and often finds us without a vital, ready faith. We know that Thou hast not promised to surround us with immunity from all the ills to which flesh is heir. We only pray that when they come, if come they must, they shall find us unafraid and with adequate resources to meet them. Give us a constant faith and a steady courage, that we may neither whimper nor in peevish petulance complain before Thee. We thank Thee that Thou dost still rule over the worl that Thou hast made. Kings and emperors come and depart. All the shouting and the tumult, the screaming hurricanes of time have not deviated Thee from Thy path. Help us to remember, O Christ, that Thou art victorious--Christus Victor--reigning over all; that in due time, in Thine own good time, Thou wilt work all things together for good to them that love Thee, who are called according to Thy purpose. May we find our refuge in that regnant faith, and so face the future without fear. Give to us Thy peace, through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen.