Why? Because Mom suffers from a terminal case of nerves when it comes to golf tournaments involving her children. Pathetic, I know. Seriously, I should be enjoying this. The simple joy of being outside in the fresh air, watching a game--a game, for pete's sake--with no agenda at the moment other than enjoying the gift of savoring my child playing a game he loves.
But when it comes to worrying, I could compete with the best of 'em. Combine that anxiousness with competitiveness, and well, it's a pretty lethal combination.
I come by it naturally. My family loved games and competition of all kinds. A "fun"family tennis game of doubles was no laughing matter. It was kill...or be killed. We loved it, of course, and loved each other. But still, the goal was victory at all costs.
And, mercy, don't even talk to me about watching the Tar Heels play basketball when I was growing up. The decibel level during those games could be ear-splitting. Even today, my children sometimes ban me from the room where we're watching the game due to my, shall we say, exuberance. Like I say, I come by this naturally--blame the Preyer clan. A loss to the team-that-shall-not-be-named could ruin our day...or our week. And never, and I mean never, say anything negative about Dean (the Dream) Smith in our presence. He's right up there with Shakespeare, Lincoln, and Churchill.
These qualities are not conducive to peacefully and contentedly watching golf tournaments. My sons and husband have repeatedly chided me for my less-than-godly attitude of tension and worry. "Chill out!" they say. "Relax! This is just a game; this is all for fun. Just enjoy it!"
And they also warn me that I cannot show any emotion. Not even the slightest hint of sighing or frowning or even smiling happily. And certainly, no tension of any kind. They can read my body language, I'm told, so I just have to stand there and somehow or other give the world the impression that I'm relaxing on a tropical island and languidly humming, "Don't worry, be happy."
Yeah, right. There's a little problem here. In case they've forgotten: I'm a WOMAN. Worse still, a MOM! Last time I checked, we women and moms do not specialize in suppressing all our emotions...especially when it comes to our children. Love seems to begat the desire that all would go well with those you love...including on the golf course.
But seriously, I know my attitude is wrong. Totally wrong. Not to mention misery-inducing. Sure, I really don't show much emotion on the outside...but on the inside, I'm dying a thousand deaths. You know how it goes--that running interior chatter that steals our peace and destroys our joy: "O Lord, not another hook into the woods!...Father, that downhill put is going going going waaaaaay beyond the hole! Arrrgh.... O mercy, I'd rather have a root canal than watch that chip out of the trap into--O NO!--the other trap!"
So I talked with the Lord and told Him I was tired of being an anxious, less-than-joyful parent on the golf course...or anywhere else for that matter. He's the God of all peace and joy and hope, and as His child, I want my character to reflect His...and not my own sometimes selfish, prideful, competitive, anxious nature. This is just no way to live--and certainly not how our Heavenly Father wants His children to live.
The Lord keeps bringing me back to Philippians 4:4-7: "Rejoice in the Lord always; again, I will say rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." Such good stuff--truly one of my favorite passages in the whole Bible.
It's a choice--a daily, hourly choice to rejoice--and rejoice always--rather than fret and complain. And a choice to pray and praise--about everything-- rather than wring our hands in worry. Turn those problems, moment-by-moment, into petitions--with thanksgiving--and then enjoy the supernatural peace that the Father longs for us to have. And peace is defined as the calm assurance that God is in complete control and that whatever He is doing is best. Best on the golf course. Best for our children. Best for our loved ones. Best when the good times roll...but also best when sorrows roll over us. Because we don't have all the facts...but God does.
So I'm happy to report, I just went to a golf tournament and actually, sort of, kind of, enjoyed it. Really. Because God and I had a little talk beforehand, and He got my mind right--Philippians 4 right, that is. Thank You, Lord, for Your patience with this very slow learning child of Yours! Worry over nothing + prayer and praise over everything = supernatural peace. That's the formula that never ever fails, for any of us, in any arena.
And here's how the Lord and I translated that formula for the golf course. It's a little acronym for "Golf"--"Game Only...Lord Forever."
Yeah, yeah, I know you probably think that's really dumb, but it sure helped me on that golf course. When things got tense, I silently reminded myself--this is a "game only...but the Lord is forever and ever! He's in control. He's the One to be praised and lifted high. He's the One who loves us infinitely. So remember in this moment--He's here and it's about Him and His glory and His greatness and His goodness. Game only...Lord forever."
Whatever you might be going through right now, remember, it's "Game only...Lord forever." No, it's not all about golf and silly games, but you fill in the blank..."_____only...Lord forever." Failure or disease or discouragement or fear or frustration or loneliness--whatever it is that is stealing your joy and peace--it's temporary. Only temporary and fleeting.
But our glorious God is forever. And He will use whatever is going on in your life or your children's lives or your loved ones' lives, to refine us and teach us and stretch us and grow us more and more into the image of the Lord Jesus....all for His glory, all by His grace, and all for our good. And since His way is absolutely the best, well, then, that's the way I want it too...whether in golf or life or death or anything in between.
______ Only...Lord Forever! To God be the glory.
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