The distant, muffled and rhythmic "Boom...boom...boom...boom..." Sunday night...the final night of the State Fair. The final hurrah of the State Fair's nightly fireworks display. We wouldn't discern their distant sound from the Fair again until next October.
We'd been hearing them every night like clockwork--beginning at 9:45. That faint sound of thunder that always signaled the glorious display of shooting, sparkling flashes of rainbow-colored happiness displayed across the black night sky. I thought of all the families enjoying the wonder for one more night, one final, sweet fall night.
I thought of all the times we'd delighted in fireworks with our children at so many places over so many years--from the State Fair to the mountains to the beach to the golf course and even to the street in front of our house. A moment of melancholy that our children are growing up and moving away washed over me. How quickly the years have sailed by. How I wish I could slow them down a bit--savor more and worry less.
My husband adores fall--it's his favorite season. And I'm inclined to agree with him. All the joy and anticipation of the holidays...but not yet with all the fuss and busyness of preparing for them! All the beauty of showy trees robed in dresses of scarlet and orange and yellow. The refreshment and cool, clean scent of fall air. And the joyous anticipation of children returning home of the holidays. All the wondrous tastes of fall--the sweetness of pumpkin anything and tart apples and hot scented cider.
So much to look happily anticipate. So much to savor.
And so much to remember. My husband says fall also proves to be a beautifully bittersweet time. For autumn brings back glad memories of his own childhood and the happiness of football and childhood friends and holidays. And the joyous memories of our own children growing up. Going to a local farm and laughing in the itchy straw for the hayride...and picking just the right pumpkin to take home. And carefully choosing just the right Halloween costume--not too scary, not too lame, not too uncomfortable. Watching thanksgiving plays or eating school thanksgiving feasts with children dressed as Indians in paper bag suits or as pilgrims with construction paper hats. Going to Greensboro or Rocky Mount and enjoying being with grandparents and siblings and hearing the ecstatic squeals of overly-sugared, but happy little ones running everywhere. Gathering around our home's old organ, while my sister, Jane, played the familiar, wonderful Christmas hymns, and we all sang at the top of our lungs. Sometimes my Daddy and brother adding a bit of accompaniment with the sax. So many wonderful memories.
But we can choose sadness over the swiftness of it all...or gladness over the gift of it all. I choose gratitude.
I choose to remember and rejoice. I choose to wonder at the gracious, generous gift of it all and say "O thank You, Father for all this...for the Fair. For the sound and beauty of fireworks. For the children. For parents and grandparents and siblings. For football games and hayrides and pilgrim hats and family sing-alongs. For the memories of so much living...and learning that You, Father, are forever good and faithful and changeless.
And with that rhythmic booming, I also thought of our good old Moses. How could I forget him?! Fireworks always alarmed our sweet old black lab, since he surely assumed they signaled the imminent arrival of the scourge of his existence--thunderstorms. O how he feared the sound and fury of thunder and would huddle nervously next to us. Occasionally pacing and looking at us as if to say, "Don't you realize something truly terrible is happening here? Is this okay? Don't we need to leave...or better yet eat?" And once again, while we miss our "Mo," I choose gratitude over the gift, rather than sorrow that is passed all too quickly.
"Only one life...twill soon be past. Only what's done for Jesus will last."
How many times have we heard that, but these swiftly flying years teach me to remember...to rejoice and be grateful...and to rest in the only One who will never change, never leave us, never forsake us, never let us down, never be less than the perfectly Omnipotent, Omniscient, Transcendent Almighty Lord.
Jesus, You're our Hope and Stay in this ever-changing life...because of Who You are and what You've done, the best is yet to come. So yes, we may experience fall's bittersweet sorrows over the swiftness of it all...but also gladness and gratitude over the gift of it all. And yes, life continues to move at a seemingly breakneck pace with our children growing up far too quickly...but we will savor these moments with joy in our hearts and wisdom in our ways. And yes, sometimes that melancholy of memories and missing loved ones who've gone on to their true Home can wash over us.
But, O my, You, Lord Jesus, are with us. Forever. And with You, we trust, we know that the best is yet to come. That will be one glorious reunion, one joyous Wedding Feast of the Lamb that will put all our Thanksgiving and Christmas celebrations and fireworks displays to shame! After all, I wonder if all our celebrations and happy memories are all just a tiny foretaste of what You have in store for us one glorious day.
So in the meantime, we choose savoring the now that we have rather than sorrowing over the then that is over.
We choose gratitude for the gifts...O so many gifts, and we choose to continue to look for those gifts every day that You give us, and we thank You for each of them.
And we choose faithfulness and trust each day in our forever faithful Father who will be with us through it all.
"Lord, You have been our dwelling place in all generations. Before the mountains were brought forth, or ever You formed the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting, You are God. You return man to dust and say, 'Return, O children of man!' For a thousand years in Your sight are but as yesterday when it is past, or as a watch in the night. You sweep them away as with a flood; they are like a dream, like grass that is renewed in the morning; in the morning it flourishes and is renewed; in the evening it fades and withers...So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom." Teach us, Lord, to treasure You and Your gifts this day.
Thank You, Lord Jesus, for the gift of autumn's memories, for the joy of Your presence with us in the gift of this day, and for the joyous gift and hope of heaven's glorious future.
To God be the glory.
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