Apples of gold

William James once wrote that the greatest need of the human heart "is the craving to be appreciated." How often have I failed to express my appreciation for those God has placed in my life. We are all so adept at finding and pointing out the faults in others--especially in those closest to us. Those whom we love and for whom we would die, we can find ourselves nitpicking, disparaging in our minds, and feeling frustrated or irritated or discouraged by their actions or attitudes. And those feelings spill over into our words and attitudes--into nagging, fussing, criticizing, disparaging, or simply withdrawing into stony silence.

We demonstrate the antithesis of grace... the grace which was so extravagantly, undeservedly, and lovingly poured out upon us "while we were yet sinners" by our Savior. What could I have ever done to deserve His saving grace? I've heard it said that "the law says 'do;' grace says 'done.' The law says 'try; grace says 'trust.' The law says 'behave;' grace says 'believe.'" If Christ was willing to die for me, give me His abundant life, and daily extend His manifold marvelous grace, despite my selfishness, greediness, pride, and utter unworthiness, how on earth can I refuse to extend His grace to others? How dare I refuse to love and love and love and overlook an offense, and forgive, and bless those He has placed in my life after all He has done and does for me every single day?

Every day He gives us the unique opportunity to be more like Jesus by extending His grace, by loving, by appreciating, by encouraging and lifting others up, by seeing and expressing our joy in them. God's Word tells us that "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver." Prov.25:11 God has given us one of the greatest and most convenient of gifts with which to bless and appreciate others: our tongues! Will we use them as an ice pick to destroy or will we use them as a paint brush to create a masterpiece of beauty? Will we give in to our emotions and vent our poisonous anger or disappointment or will we ask God to demonstrate His grace and love through us despite our feelings? Will we put aside our busyness and our agendas and stop to appreciate and bless those around us--from the grocery store clerk to the frazzled teacher to the fast food worker?

As long as I live, I will never forget an incident at my mother's funeral. My mother was an incorrigible encourager and affirmer of everyone with whom she came in contact. She genuinely loved people and was constantly looking for ways to lighten their load or lift their spirits. As my family stood outside the sanctuary before the service, a red-eyed, sweet middle-aged woman walked up to us. She was in a Wendy's uniform. She said to us, "I got off work to come to Mrs. Preyer's funeral, but I cannot stay long cause I have to get back to work. But I had to come." By now, she was weeping as she told us how much Mom had meant to her. "Whenever she came in, she would always tell me I was beautiful."

"A word fitly spoken, is like apples of gold in a setting of silver."

The world is filled with people who desperately need a word of affirmation or encouragement or grace. Who better than we as believers, who have been recipients of such infinite grace and love, to share that word that lifts and lightens and loves? Don't let the day go by without extending God's grace, in the form of that golden apple, to someone else. And don't forget to start with those in your home. Look for ways to affirm even if you don't feel affirmed. Look for ways to love and encourage and point them to the Savior. And then remember to give God all the glory!