Well, we're off to watch our oldest son, Richard, play in one of the last remaining college golf tournaments at Davidson. Where on earth has the time gone? He surely arrived there as a freshman the day before yesterday...and now he'll be graduating in a little over a month?! No way...but yes way. Time doesn't march on...time sprints on.
Lord, can't we make a little agreement to freeze time and all our children for say, 5 to 10 years?
I think I know the answer to that question...so instead, I join King David with the prayer, "Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." (Ps.90:12)
But here's what I've been thinking a lot about lately--time is a limited and precious resource. Duh, you say? But still, how often do we treat lots of other far less important and expendable things as more valuable than the brief time God gives us on this planet? I try not to go out and throw $20 bills all over the ground to be blown about in the wind. I make an effort not to ruin our children's best clothes when I'm doing laundry (sometimes I fail in this endeavor--a size large Broughton golf jacket recently became a small. sigh). I valiantly strive not to back our suburban into walls or mailboxes (again, not always with success).
Yet how often do I throw away and waste time as if I have an infinite supply of it? Sure, we have eternity in heaven...but while our feet trod the dust of this earth, we have a limited amount of time and energy to do what God's called us to do and to love Him and the people He's put in our lives. Shouldn't we go after expending this extraordinarily priceless resource with every ounce of our wisdom and intention and gratitude?
So, yes, I've got loads to do, but now it's time to go watch our son play golf. Granted, I feel sick with nervousness the whole time and assume I'm going to drop dead of a heart attack while following him...but I'm handing that to God and asking Him to renew my warped perspective and give me joy and gratitude in each moment. After all, as I shared in a blog last summer, I keep reminding myself of the acronym the Lord whispered to me: "Golf" can stand for Game Only, Lord Forever!
But can I also share something I read recently in a book by Shauna Niequist that has helped refocus my attitude towards time? As a young, frazzled, exhausted mother, Niequist met one day with a much older, wiser grandmother and asked her how on earth she seemed to have gotten everything done with such joy and excellence. And here was this woman's response: "It's not hard to decide what you want your life to be about. What's hard, is figuring out what you're willing to give up in order to do the things you really care about."
Bingo!
Shauna said she later sat down and wrote two lists: "Things I do" and "Things I don't do." She said the first list was easy--her priorities were her faith in Christ, her marriage, her son, her group of friends, and cooking meals for friends (as this is something that joyfully feeds her soul). But making the list for "Things I don't do" was far harder--because, let's face it, don't we all want to do everything well?
That Proverbs 31 woman sometimes haunts my dreams, because she makes me feel so inadequate. I should be able to grow all our own vegetables, cook Martha Stewart-worthy meals, sew all those missing buttons, hem all those clothes and iron all those khakis before 8:00 a.m...not to mention have a spotless house with no clutter, never miss a friend's birthday, volunteer regularly in all our children's schools....all the while spending plenty of quality time with my Savior, encouraging and loving my husband and children, and...oh good grief, I'm exhausted just thinking about it.
So here's the thing. I've finally decided that I'm putting away my childish dream of doing it all and doing it perfectly. Nope, never gonna happen. Our endless quest for 360 degree perfection accomplishes one thing--destroys relationships. Something has to give...and let's choose to cast aside the relentless striving and instead seek to use our time loving and living to God's glory and with His priorities.
That means, for instance, that I'm going to stop worrying about the fact that I'm a crummy, lazy gardener. Yes, I love beautiful yards...but not enough to put it on my "Things I do list." Not when I have only limited time for gardening in this season of my life and it's simply not one of passions. Doesn't feed my soul. I really apologize if this eyesore of our yard drives others crazy...but time is priceless and there are husbands and children and friends to love and other priorities to pursue right now.
I won't go into the specifics of what needs to go on each list, because it's different for everyone..and it may change in different seasons of life. I never could have helped teach a women's Bible study when all our children were younger and all at home. Some people can do this, but I lacked the organizational skills to keep that many balls up in the air. But now, in this season of life, God has allowed me the time to pursue this glorious privilege. Thank You, Father! So I challenge you to really think about this and ask God: "what things do I do" and, especially, "what things don't I do" in this season of my life. Because He's given you this one awfully brief dance on this planet--don't you want to be using these days and hours and minutes the way your Creator knows is best for you? We've got eternity in heaven to do all that other stuff.
Okay, time to shut up...you haven't got all day to read this! Time to get busy loving, living, and rejoicing in the gift of this day.
To God--the Author, Creator, and Sustainer of time--be all the glory.
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