Thank You Lord for another good day and night with Janie! She is still sleeping this morning, and I smile to myself that I'm rejoicing in what simple things now bring me such joy and satisfaction. A whole night with no crises, no rising fevers or struggling lungs, no falling out of the bed (that was terrifying--happened the other night--but again, God's amazing faithfulness and protection of Janie), no sound of ventilators or strident beeping when her heart rate suddenly shot up or the medicine was empty... nope, just quiet rest for the most part.
And what a fun day for Janie yesterday--visiting with a group of her high school girlfriends and wonderful Young Life leader and then a late night visit with Tessa and her dad. Boy, there's just nothing like the gift of fellowship. Again, we all tend to forget that in our busy lives--we need to all slow down a moment to truly visit and share and laugh and encourage those God has placed in our lives. Help me to remember this, Lord, when our lives begin to reboot.
a little later...
Janie just got up, and we had a quick but great time reading Daily Light and Jesus Calling. God, You just keep amazing us and feeding us and encouraging us--thank You Father! Always just the right Word for what we need today.
Daily manna for our daily needs. Just this morning we read: "Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in the due season we shall reap if we do not give up." (Gal.6:9) The Lord knew she needed this good word on this particular morning. Janie was feeling discouraged at how far she has to go while wanting so desperately to get back home and back to school, back to "my life." What a gift this morsel of His manna to remind her not to quit, not to grow weary while running this race He has marked out just for her (and for us--we need the reminder just as badly as she does, perhaps more), and trust Him for the harvest at the finish line.
Janie cries tears of gratitude when I read her just a few of the verses dear friends have been praying for her. A verse her sister, Mary Norris, and I have been praying for her since this marathon began: "For truly I say to Janie, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, Janie will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for Janie." (Mt.17:20) Lord, You have been moving so many mountains, and we give You all the glory. But right now, we ask You would strengthen Janie and encourage her heart for the battle ahead. She is discouraged right now and wants to get home so badly--would you remind her of that mustard seed of faith within her and the HUGE, Almighty, omnipotent Lord in which that seed of faith rests?
a lot later...
Well, now home with the boys, late at night, eyes are heavy and the day seems to have fled. This is one marathon of a blog... like the energizer bunny it just keeps going and going and going. My energy, on the other hand, does not.
But before hitting the sack, the Lord brings to mind all the children we saw on Janie's wing of the hospital. After she left Intensive Care the other day, she was placed in the Children's Hospital. During the night, I would sometimes hear a loud announcement for a team of doctor's to go to such and such a room or for a trauma team to go to a certain location. And it all came back to me... that first phone call, that desperate fear, that helplessness, that watching your child hooked to breathing tubes and feeding tubes and monitors, and feeling powerless to do anything, save pray and pray and pray.
Father, I whispered, be with all these struggling folks. Be with these children, be with their families--comfort and calm them, reassure them that You are with them in the ICU and the waiting rooms and the oncology wards. Forgive me for so quickly focusing only on my child that I miss the suffering world all around me. Forgive my selfishness, and give me a heart that hurts and loves and reaches out like Yours.
There is nothing like pain to make your heart pliable and compassionate, and this is a lesson I want to never forget. I don't want to be the same person I was before Janie's accident; O how I pray that all of us know and love the the Savior more dearly as He has walked with us through this fiery trial. C.S. Lewis famously wrote: "God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks to us in our conscience, but shouts in our pains; it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." Lord, help us to hear, help the world to hear and see. Wake them up, Lord! Wake us up, just as You did with Janie!
"Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work; you don't give up." Anne Lamott
Thank You, Lord, for giving us hope in the dark. Would You do it again in the lives of those who need to see Your Light right now? And help us all to keep working, keep showing up, keep refusing to give up even when the way ahead seems long and uncertain. For we trust that "in due season we will reap if we do not give up."
To God, our Hope, be all the glory.
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