How wonderful to be home and take a walk today on the first day of fall! I can so clearly remember standing by a window in the ICU in Greenville and looking outside at all the cars zipping by and pedestrians scurrying down the sidewalks. It was a rainy day, and I thought, "How I wish we were running errands, rushing to get the groceries, just living our busy lives like all those folks out there."
Somehow--ridiculously, absurdly I now knew, we thought we were "stressed out" by all we had to do.
Suddenly, however, our world had constricted to the narrowest of priorities--waiting and praying for our daughter to survive and wake up. Gone were all thoughts of the phone calls to return or school projects to work on or birthday presents to purchase or closets to clean out or fund raisers to help out with and on and on. Now I longed for such normalcy. Such joyously busy regular old days where I had too much to do and too little time--but all the while I had completely missed the pricelessness, the remarkable wonder of living such a life with and for the people that you love.
How could I not have been overcome with gratitude and joy every moment?! I didn't have to do all those routine chores, all that laundry, all those errands, all that cleaning and cooking--no, I got to do it! I had the inestimable privilege of daily serving and loving the King of Kings... as well as His beloved children in the form of the people He sovereignly placed in my life.
So today, as I basked in the sunshine and breathed deeply of the fresh air, I rejoiced at the incredible, undeserved joy and privilege of getting to live this life. Of getting to run to the grocery store. Of getting to try to get a handle on the mess and clutter (all evidence of the people that I love so dearly--so God bless the clutter!). Of getting to write notes or make phone calls to people that Jesus loved so much He died just for them--and I get to write or talk to them! Of getting to laugh at and enjoy Janie's now oh-so-beautiful eccentricities. Of getting to help/encourage/ nag/fuss about homework--but now even that is suffused with joy, since God is allowing me to love and serve my family. Of getting to pray for others in the hospital and doing it with a new intensity and love and faith, because we have been there and witnessed God's supernatural power.
Thank You for the privilege, Lord. Thank You for the chores and the busyness and the routine and the rush and even the ruts in our lives. Thank You for the messes and even the mess-ups, because You are working ALL things together for good in the lives of those who love You. (Rom.8:28) Thank You for the challenges and even the crises, for they drive us closer to You, our Rock and Refuge, and enable us to experience as never before how great and good You are.
"Thou that hast given so much to me give me one thing more, a grateful heart: not thankful when it pleaseth me, as if Thy blessings had spare days, but such a heart whose pulse may be Thy praise." (George Herbert)
O Lord, let our pulse be praise! When we worry, let that be a reminder, an alarm in our hearts to immediately begin to worship. Give us eyes to see the blessings all around us--remove the blinders of routine and busyness that blind us to the common, everyday treasures that constitute Your daily goodness and grace to us. Give us one thing more, we ask, Father: grateful hearts.
I love how Ann Voscamp put it: "God never stops whispering: Give thanks anyways--do this in remembrance of Me... God says to give thanks, to do this in remembrance of Him--because in the remembering to give thanks, it's our broken places that are re-membered--and we are the ones made whole." He takes the broken shards of our disappointments and disasters, our failures and fears, even just our busyness and exhaustion and inadequacies, and as we remember to give thanks, He shapes those broken pieces into something beautiful and eternal and glorious.
Just incredible--but, then, that's the kind of God we serve. Always restoring and resurrecting and redeeming. So thank You Lord. As we go through our days--whether overwhelmingly busy with the routine or sorrowfully constricted with some crisis--give us hearts whose pulse is Your praise. Because in You, we always have reason for thanksgiving. To God be the glory.
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